i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Randomize