remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
