I think I just saw someone hide a body.
love makes seman taste better
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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