I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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