and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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