these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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