watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Vodka?
Forever.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Randomize
