So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
