You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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