I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
