Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
