So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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