Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
is wine microwaveable?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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