how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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