He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
