So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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