so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
