walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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