Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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