Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think weed is turning my hair brown
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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