So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
she looked like the before picture.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
