$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
