just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
