no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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