just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
