i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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