And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize