He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
