We won't sleep together?
Sponge bath it is.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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