Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
