yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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