Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I think I died a long time ago.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
