is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
