After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize