He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
