she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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