did you get engaged???
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Are we still banned from the library?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
