He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize