For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
whose parrot is this?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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