all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
