I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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