Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize
