The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize