we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
