No stitches, just platelets and will power
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
