there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
