you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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