The maid of honor just puked.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
