I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
it was like eating out sand paper
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
