And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
