On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
